Of late, I have been listening to and reading a number of debates about rape.
I have found the contentions of the people engaged in this battle absolutely correct; however, at this juncture, I wonder whether we are really invalidating - might I say, unhinging - the ideology of violence.
I wonder whether it is not high time for Italy to bear in mind and put to good use the experience of feminists in other countries who have, long since, unceasingly attacked both sexual violence and its deep cultural roots. The crux of the matter is that, in Italy, the undue influence, the coercion of its authoritarian Catholicism is most unconscionable.
We are still overpowered by Sexual Taboos!
(And, in this context, we could expatiate at length on the relationship between sexual disinformation, record numbers of rapes, record levels of corruption, and record breaking lack of freedom in the media along with the very existence of Berlusconi, the Living Anomaly…)
In Italy, the first point about which very little has been and is being said is the crucial relationship between rape and pleasure.
The prevailing idea in the (Italic) feuding patriarchal culture regards rape as a winning act of dominion.
The male manages to gain pleasure from a woman against her will, humiliating her.
This firm belief is one of the elements that increase raped women’ s sufferings.
However, is the picture really thus?
By no means, as affirmed by such nearly archaic texts as William Reich’s “The Sexual Revolution”. Overpowered by the patriarchal culture of dominion, the rapist IS UNABLE TO EXPERIENCE AN ORGASM.
This is an essential detail upon which Anglo-Saxon and Scandinavian feminists and therapists have been working for decades.
Experiences gained from programmes conducted for the rehabilitation of convicted rapists have demonstrated that they suffer from acute schizophrenia. Rapists are totally frigid males, that is: their ejaculation is not matched by any orgasmic pleasure; and the only pleasure they can feel is but mental. In other words, it’ s a kind of chemical climax caused by a discharge by the body of substances similar to heroin. Such discharges are triggered by the emotional shock ensuing the practice of violence per se and are equal to those experienced by soldiers on the battlefield or by criminals during a robbery. Evidently, this kind of pleasure is out of all relation to the rapture, the bliss of sexual orgasm.
Under the sexual point of view, rapists are totally frigid individuals and their pleasure is but a superficial, chemical and mechanical reaction connected to the stress of violence.
Let us say it loud and clear! First and foremost because it will rid rape victims of that surplus of humiliation prompted by the idea that they were the table set for a gory feast of pleasure.
It is a subtle, yet essential point. On account of personal circumstances, I have been in touch with many raped women. The first step, agonizing but essential, consists in facing up to and dealing with the memory of the pain. In other words, the victim should become aware of the turmoil of the inner voices encroaching on her mind. The natural pain caused by the violence inflicted upon her is heightened by the burden dumped on her by the patriarchal ideology:
1) The sense of guilt: you were raped because you were not chaste. You did not hold out long enough against violence because you were filthy inside and looking for trouble.
2) You are worthless! You are a nonentity. Men need only to take and use you to extort their sensuous enjoyment from you. You are powerless, you cannot even prevent their taking pleasure in you. And since you have given pleasure, you have partaken in the rape. Your suffering is nothing; the man raping you does not even feel your anguish.
Understanding the structure of the pain inflicted upon a victim of sexual violence is tantamount to getting to the heart of the horror of these two wicked ideas.
Understanding that part of the anguish that ensues not only the mere brutality of the act but also the context within which that violence is lived: it is not easy to understand the impossibility for the rapist to reach his orgasm as an experience contrasting with a psychological stress condition and in a situation of total lack of empathy.
However, this understanding is an essential passage to lower the psychological anguish that rape will encroach upon her throughout her life. Understanding that true and blissful sexual pleasure is an experience dependent upon the sharing of the emotional tumult set off by the jubilation of feelings leads us to give sexuality a sacred value and, thence, to imagine anew a sexual life, the experience of the forced expropriation notwithstanding (chapters 14 and thereafter of The Lazy Revolution are dedicated to this subject.
Read on some thoughts about the specific concept of male frigidity.
Read on some thoughts about rape and frigidity).
Likewise, accepting the idea that male’ s frigidity is the main component of phallocratic sexuality (some 50% of men are affected by this syndrome) is essential even if we want to reach that cultural revolution which is our only tool to really contrast the repetition of sexual violence.
In every interview, in every editorial on this subject, we should insist on the point that rapists are poor fellows who cannot come to a climax!
Emotional cripples. The sexuality of porno films is pathetic: that kind of sex is not an agreeable experience. The peak of pleasure, of bliss is attained only by those who let themselves be swept away by the magic of sharing, of feeling. Kamasutra positions do not make sex more pleasurable; mutual understanding and emotions do.
This should be our battering ram to have the ear of the millions of males who live in the belief that Moana Pozzi’ s oral sex, performed at the speed of a grinder, is the very best they may wish for themselves.
I have lectured groups of students on sex education for twenty years.
And when I was able to lay bare some youngster boggling in the myth of the super-hard super-prick sexuality I realized that he was trapped in an impregnable ideological fortress.
All the beautiful talks about respect, justice and noble feelings bounced off him, hit by such powerful mental bat as is an effective and easy ideology: “I’ m-going-to-stick-my-cock-into-your-mouth-enjoy-you-slut”. The only efficacious release lever is telling the chap: ”My little darling, do you really believe that porno actresses can give super blowjobs?” (Quite obviously, I do not utter those very words because I would be arrested; however, that’ s the message I am trying to convey with a sequence of sophisticated words and double meanings).
If one really wants to get into his ideological castle, one must understand that a 15-year-old is not a phallocrat by vocation. He is a poor wretch clutching to the only thing being offered to him that is not chastity. Deep down, his instinctive side, the spark that brightens and animates him, is spontaneously looking for a happy and shared sexual intimacy but he lacks the words to picture it. Lets us give all such words to him! Starting with the basic concept: there is no pleasure in forcible sexuality.
The second essential point in combating rape is the provision of INFORMATION ABOUT SEX. Monsters are born out of crass ignorance.
The battle for information about sex has been central for world feminism. However, this did not happen in Italy, a country culturally blocked by catholic-communist moralizing. Such subjects as the use of pelvic muscles during sexual intercourse have been essential for countries North of the Alps (Vaginal Muscles: click here).
In the mid-eighties, I had the privilege of being lynched because I had explained in Tango, the satirical supplement to the daily “Unità”, in a didactic and detailed key, how to exercise the muscles of the pelvic floor and make use of them during intercourse.
Whilst, in my blog dealing with bullyboys, I have covered the relationship between sexual education and violence, here I would like to provide explicit and precise information on the movement of the pubic-coccygeal zone.
In fact, this is not only a question concerning women’ s physiological wellbeing and orgasmic capacity.
The activation of vaginal muscles during intercourse reverses the sex roles and the male becomes a passive subject in comparison with the woman’ s abilities.
A penis has no muscles!
And only when, during intercourse, a woman sucks the penis with her vagina the man attains a true and deep orgasm (by stimulating the L spot).
Thanks to the information on vaginal movements, we can unhinge and discard the concept of the man penetrating the woman. The male is ensnared, the female is swallowing him in.
THAT’ S ABSOLUTE PLEASURE!
The natural physiology of intercourse practised by a woman activating to the fullest the power of her muscles makes HER the most active of the two partners!
While it may sound like a futile debate, it is a fundamental element in the fight against rape: only when intercourse is practised with a sexually active woman does a man activate the L spot and, thus, reach the apex of his orgasm. THEREFORE, the true and authentic man will look for women who activate inside if he wants to reach exquisite pleasure.
In matriarchal communities, rape in conceptually incomprehensible because no normal male will ever have any interest in penetrating a DEAD VAGINA.
And this concept (a living vagina will give pleasure and a dead one none!) strengthens our campaign whose aim is to unhinge the dement structure of male chauvinism by revealing and denouncing the rapist’ s frigidity.
TENDER LOVING TANTRIST SEX
Obviously, a complement of general information about sex should be part of this effort. And such information should provide, in addition to particulars about sex anatomy, facts about diverse forms of sexuality, such as the Tender Loving Tantrist Sex, where lovers are indulging in a sort of ecstasy of fondling cuddles. This should be taught in schools because it would reveal to the students that intercourse is a moment of celebration of the sacredness of life and the magic of emotions. To stand still, sexually sheathed (the woman is penetrated without her man having an erection!), listen to each other and take pleasure in the minute thrills of joy that love can ooze out. It would let students acquire a vision of sex that is in no way connected to violence but is craving for pleasure to the fullest of feelings and emotions.
The idea behind the Tender Loving Tantra is powerful since it purports the concept of soft penetration. The practice of penetration without an erection shatters away the male archetype of manhood. A woman telling a man: “I don’ t care whether it’ s hard or drooping” would be attempting on the fascist principles governing sex.
In conclusion, I hope that the movement arising from sexual violence will adopt these two essential communication tools to begin a new phase of the struggle that will, at long last, bring about tangible results.
On the one hand, we should deliver our discourses to all possible audiences and, on the other, demand that Rai broadcasts programmes dealing with male frigidity, the wonderful possibilities of the female sexual muscles and the sacredness of the ecstasy of emotions.
Let us stop the feeble opposition to the mental machinery of rape.
The patriarchal ideology is a paper tiger. Let us piss on it.