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WHY
DON'T WOMEN USE
THEIR LITTLE MUSCLES?
When
I write on this subject, many people cringe. What I want to say
is incredibly banal but unfortunately it is still not part of the
common heritage of mankind. How can I keep silent?
In a few words, the fact is that the vagina possesses a formidable
muscular tract that women use very little. Civilized men and women
use alltheir muscles little and badly which is a serious matter,
but not to use the vaginal muscles is particularly damaging.
After
"Tango" published a series of my articles on this problem,
a lot of my women friends asked me if I weren't exaggerating with
this story of the little muscles: " It's clear that there are
muscles and it's clear that they're used when making love!"
But no. Certainly, you use your muscles a bitÉ but between using
them a bit and really using them, there is a huge difference. And
I'm not referring to sophisticated acrobatic erotic games. Any woman
with a bit of sensitivity can succeed, just by trying to contract
the inner walls of her vagina. Already this changes the level of
sexual pleasure considerably. And not only for the man, who immediately
goes wild, but also for the woman. In fact, once its muscles are
activated, the vagina becomes much more sensitive. Which is good
for the woman.
But, although no small matter, this still isn't everything. Nature,
in its infinite goodness, has equipped woman's vaginal muscles (and
generally all the females of the mammal family) with other amazing
capacities.
With a bit of care and commitment, a woman can succeed in moving
her vaginal muscles even up and down. And this is great. Essentially,
it brings about a radical change in the quality of love relationships.
There
is the same difference between painting and animated cartoons. In
the sense that animated cartoons are better. And when I say better,
I mean better for him, better for her, better for everyone.
The incredible thing is that you have said something very banal
like: "Your cleft has fantastic muscles. Use them!"Yet
you are not understood. I could talk at length here on ten thousand
years of male chauvinism and on the psychophysical desexualization
(or castration) of woman and on 25 other sociopolitical aspects
of the oppression of woman, etc. But I will spare you.
With this, I am not trying to say that to learn how to move the
walls of your vagina is within everyone's ability. You may try and
not succeed. But this doesn't really depend on motory inability.
The muscles of the pussy are inseparably connected to your mind
and you can move them with the same facility as those of the arm
or leg. It's a psychological block. You must have confidence in
yourself and accept a few failed attempts.
Furthermore,
you must want to improve your sexual relations. Which is not for
everyone. Many are convinced they are not able to improve and aren't
interested in improving or don't think they are able to improve
in a quick or pleasurable way.
The other obstacle is that you need to find a man who tells you
where and how you are moving. But I think that is easy enough to
find. I want to show you now how important this matter of vaginal
movement is. Not only does it increase both lovers' satisfaction,
but also it changes the cultural basis, the idea of sex itself.
The image of penetration and that of the man who performs the act
of penetration is stamped in our culture.
I hope that you agree that it is usually the man who is considered
the one who mostly performs the "in and out". So that,
among homosexuals, he who penetrates is called active and he who
receives is called passive.
Now if women used what nature has given them, this would lead to
a head-on clash with male chauvinism. A woman is potentially much
more active than a man. The penis is usually limited to in and out
movements.
Women can do frighteningly more. But the revolution would go beyond
this. One male disaster is, in my opinion, a general incapacity
to experience good sexual satisfaction. Certainly, the sexual block
in men is caused by distortions dating back to the patriarchal age.
Man has difficulty enjoying sex as a simple, marvellous sensory
and emotional experience.
Men
are too conscious of the drama of conquest, of possession and of
control to be able to enjoy sex for itself, the present, the "here"
and "now" of skin against skin. But it is also true that
sex is problematic for man precisely because he feels he has to
be active. He feels he is responsible for the whole sexual act.
Instead he is only 50% responsible. As a footnote, I believe that
the movement of the vagina even has miraculous effects on premature
ejaculation. To conclude, I will give you two guidelines. I don't
want to impose on woman's sense of guilt the additional burden of
having to be, not only beautiful, willing, a mother a and manager,
but also a super vaginal acrobat.
It
is just a matter of removing a restriction that has always been
imposed on women, a restriction that may even be damaging to the
health (in northern countries, exercises on this kind of movements
are included in physical education programs for girls as a means
of prevention for liquid incontinence, which after a certain age
affects many women).
Besides, the idea of limiting the love experience to an athletic
show is not what I believe in. It is understood that love is essentially
an emotional, magical and cultural experience, and that feeling
is everything.
Nevertheless,
even the technical and physical aspect (the good use of and the
good rapport with your own body) has its importance. I don't believe
in love without the tumultuous encountering of bodies, without the
rumbling circulation of energies from one to the other, without
the pleasure of the flesh, the oblivion of the senses. Love is great
when in pleasure, the body prevails over the mind and sensations
rule over reasoning.
For this reason making love fully is better. Believe me. All you
need is five minutes to discover how much I say is true. Then you
will love me forever.
P.S.: From a technical point of view, the way to experiment these
new levels of beatitude is to practise sex by remaining still. Stop
moving with in and out. Once the penis has been inserted in the
right place, stop there. By remaining like this, your desire (if
you have a soul) will heighten. Resist the temptation to move in
a disorderly way and concentrate on your wonderful vagina. Try to
localize your little muscles and begin to familiarize yourself with
the cerebral commands that set them off. Where must you move in
order to move them? This is the problem. Remain still and don't
worry about his erection. He can wait. If you even succeed in producing
the slightest muscular rustle, you will see that he will be in ecstasy.
But don't let him move. Practice makes perfect.
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